Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Anzac Day – Some people fear war, I fear moths.

Last night Craig and I were watching Grey’s Anatomy (oh how I love it) when an ad came on that featured a girl (and then a boy) being terrorised by a moth.
Craig : oh come on! It’s just a moth
Sarah : Just a Moth? JUST A MOTH? They’re flying rats with wings! Gah.
Craig : but … it’s just a moth…
Sarah : no they divebomb and they’re furry and gah the huge ones ughhhh
Craig : Huge ones? They’re tiny
Sarah : Uh, have you seen the ones as big as your, well, my hand? HAVE YOU?
Craig : ha! As big as your hand??
Sarah : … yes!
Craig : no … really?
Sarah : … YES! As BIG as MY HAND. I’ve seen them twice and the first time I freaked out shaking for 45 minutes before crying and the next time it kept me from the kitchen because I could see it on the chair and it looked like it was breathing and they’re so awful
Craig : huh.
Sarah : I’m going to google “Giant Terror Moths” tomorrow and prove it.

But “Giant Terror Moths” only brought back reviews of Blood Beast Terror, a 1969 movie about a creature that is capable of transforming back and forth between a giant Death Head moth and a beautiful woman. The creature masquerades as his daughter when she is in her human incarnation and feeds on the blood of her victims when she is in the moth form. which sounds really fucking scary but not exactly real, or native to New Zealand (I hope).


Puriri moth
Aenetus virescens
Of the more than 1500 different moths in New Zealand, the biggest and most spectacular is the puriri or ghost moth of the North Island.
The female’s wingspan can be up to 15-centimetres, its pale velvety-green colour very ghost-like.

A GIANT MOTH also known as the GHOST MOTH ?? I think my fear is justified.
Also – wing span = 15cm? Sarah’s hand span = 16cm.
So it is Definitely AS BIG AS MY HAND.

It’s no better when the wings are furled around its fat furry creepy moth body.

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Apparently all these years Craig has thought my fear of moths (the same fear that has brought me to tears at times) is based on

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The Silver Y moth Chrysodeixis eriosoma
Wing span = 36 mm

He has no faith in me at all.

Sarah : So wait, all this time you’ve thought my fear of moths stemmed from those tiny furry Kauri* moths?
Craig : Well, you’ve been known to think some crazy things.

* Please note : Googling for Kauri Moths bore no fruit (so to speak) and so I had to wade through photo after photo of horrifying furry moths until I guessed at something that looked familiar. I now have extremely tense arms because moths tend to make my arms twitch in disgust (the fear is in my head and my stomach).
The things I do for you, I swear.

Monday, April 24, 2006

My Hephaestus (only, he's not lame ... and he's not a blacksmith)

Sitting here in my short sleeves I can feel my hair near my elbows - a sign of a good day.

I fell in love with my husband all over again this weekend.

On Saturday night we went to see Dylan Moran and the seats were up in the gods.
It was the first time I had any sort of feeling akin to vertigo and I found it unnerving.
I kept looking at the elaborate ceiling that was so close to us and feeling my head swim just a little.
Mr Moran was a tiny tiny little man, fitting for his tiny angry diatribe that made up much of the show. He was very funny, but he spent far too long talking about how everyone is unhappy all the time which made me feel sorry for him, tiny angry little leprechaun man, I'm happy most of the time.
There was a heckler. I hate hecklers with a passion but Dylan gave him a dressing down "you just sit there and evolve", "you had a shit time there, you're having a shit time here, ever think that maybe it isn't the location?" - on learning the heckler was an irishman.
"Your smell has a sound"
All art is "jesus, fruit or tits".
Leaving the theatre we met a friend who turned around and said "Have you seen his DVD Monster?" uh no "you just did."

My poor, tired, long suffering husband put up with me as I dragged him to Espressoholic with Kat and Tim and ... others. He yawned and smiled and made dirty conversation and drank orange juice while we had coffee.
Tim : somethingsomething like a horse!
Craig : oh well, I don't like to brag
Kat : Ha! you should ask his Wife!
Sarah's Head : don't say it, don't say it, it's gross and just gah! don't say it ...
Sarah : Well, I don't choke and tell.
Sarah's Head : gah, damnit!

On Sunday morning I managed to touch Craig's lips enough to wake him up before 10. We had very important shopping missions to accomplish. Craig has been wearing a jersey-jacket for a couple of years now and the grey has heathered to a purple-y-brown and the collar has frayed. So we went hunting for them.
He ended up with two, one with a blue that brings out his eyes and I love, and one that makes him look like a race-car driver which he loves.
On the way back home we stopped so I could purchase 2 canvases and a graphite pencil. I spent the afternoon painting while Craig created dentist noises in the garage.

It was nice spending so much time with him, talking in the interval up in the gods, holding hands in the courtyard of espressoholic, standing in the same changing room as he tries on jackets, driving out to Tawa and back singing along to old rock songs and having him come inside smelling of metal, my Hephaestus, telling me that my painting is very pretty.

Oh also - I'm winning our bet.
I found trivia about the test track for Top Gear - that Gambon corner is so called because Michael Gambon came close to rolling his car as he drove (maniacally) around it. I brought this fact to Craig like a cat with a mouse and all he said was "... yea?" as if to say "... I know, so what?".
According to him they tell this anecdote nearly weekly, and I swear that I've never heard it before.
I tried to bet him $10 that they wouldn't mention it that week, but he wasn't having a bar of it. I then bet that they wouldn't mention it once in the next month (4 shows) and we shook on it and the bet was on.
So far it has been two shows, and not one tale of Michael Gambon's driving.
At least I know he's not just letting me win this bet.