Yesterday after picking me up from work Craig and I were standing in our lounge when wordlessly he bent down and put a copy of our brand-new wedding dvd in the player.
Rajeev dropped off ten copies the night before and (as always with watching myself) I saw them as exciting but worrisome, a good keepsake but causing an oh-god-it's-me kind of feeling in the pit of my stomach.
(Besides, I'd been trying to remember the speech I made and whenever I did, I got the distinct feeling that I had seemed a complete berk. Which was quite appropriate really.)
But we watched it, and I cringed but it was lovely. Very well made, so much more than I could have hoped for, and while the cinematographer boys were worried about the sound at the reception (technical difficulties) I thought that what they ended up with was more than just adequate. We heard every funny and touching word possible.
And besides the undeniable poncey-ness of my accent, I didn't die while watching my own speech. I even managed an annoying-Keira-Knightly-in-Love-Actually moment of I look quite pretty.
I also noticed that the left side of my face moves a lot more than the right side. Crazy.
So we can have copies made, and I might just see if I can manage to put clips online or something as it's coming up to a year now!
Finally, sitting there, curled up on the couch with my head on Craig's shoulder and noticing, out of the corner of my eye, that he was mouthing his vows along with himself-on-t.v. was the most heartbreakingly perfect moment I'd had in a while.