I have a fear. I am just the teeniest bit afraid that my head might explode (boom) because ... well ... everything is going right. For a change. My poor cynical cranium, It is unused to the pressure of such things.
Oh. Now that I think about it. this seems all terribly depressing. I did not intend it to be so! I simply mean that I'm unused to so MANY things going right ALL AT THE SAME TIME.
(boom)
(boom)
I am SO excited.
On top of all of this my social calendar is just bursting at the seams.
These next few weeks are a flurry of packing and moving and work functions and passport applications and birthday parties and oh just everything.
Dear Internet,
Please forgive me, for I am about to rant.
Last night I went to the World of Wearable Arts dress rehearsal.
It was horrible. I do not know why I thought I would like it - I do not like interpretive dance, I don't find the wearable art particularly moving*, and I never watch the televised version because it bores me. But I went. It was horrible.
I suppose, the one good thing that came out of last night is that now, when I am told - in a smarmy tone, ALWAYS the smarmy tone - that I really MUST go because it's just TOO TOO fabulous and how it's SUCH A SHAME that I live in Wellington and DON'T GO to WoW I can tell them that I did go. And it was horrible.
Besides the general boredom, the insufferable child & animal performers, the men-dressed-as-women-equals-hilarious shtick, and the women in the audience hooting everytime a man wore tights, there was one straw which broke the proverbial camel's back.
Fred fucking Dagg.
I am sick and tired of being made to feel like I am not a "real" New Zealander because I do not like the countryside.
Because I do not own or like mud-caked gumboots and a wife beater. Because, more often than not, I find pavlova cloying and overly sweet. Because I do not like paua shell. Because I do not know Ten Guitars.
Because my idea of a future life for my family does not involve a paddock. The quarter acre dream is not mine. I do not secretly want to retire to the country and do hard yakka. I enjoy that I am not entirely sure to what the "number eight" in "number eight wire" refers, though I presume it is the gauge. I do not want a bach with a corrugated iron shed and worn sheets on the splinter-y bedframes.
I like the city. I prefer the city.
I like the background hum of traffic, I like the smell of rain on a hot pavement, I like that there are cafés and bars and restaurants and stores all within walking distance, I like people-watching. I like wearing inappropriate shoes and never wearing trackpants. I loathe enclosed shopping malls and homogenised suburbs. Give me urban, give me grime, give me culture.
I admit, I can admire verdure, and clean air, and stars. I like that the countryside is there, over the hills, a drive and a bit away. That's fine. It's nice that it's there if I feel like a change.
But I am a town mouse. I always will be. I am sick of being told I am not a real New Zealander because of it.
sincerely, Sarah-Rose
* and I LIKE modern art. I just like pieces which make me feel something other than "huh" or "meh".
I've said before and I'll say it again: I just adore Flickr*. In their adorable little Stats section of my account I get to see how people end up at my photos. More often than not it's because strangers are searching for tattoo photos - I should know, I did the same. So I tend to help those people out by tagging my photos in a helpful manner**. Less often they are searching for Leather Skirts or Scarves. For a while there were people searching for Self Injury. Which I do NOT approve of but I do tend to take self-portraits of my injuries so what can I do? I think I changed the injury tag to accident. Because they all were. Accidental I mean.
I'm getting off point.
I noticed that there was one referee which was "all cctv information'. Huh? that piqued my interest. Turns out? A photo of a vintage fire alarm site has been used on a Malaysian site about CCTV. With credit. Which is fine!
Oh internet, you amuse me so!
* this post is not sponsored. Sadly. ** incidentally? I ran a little tag experiment last week when I posted the photos of my side tattoo by tagging them with "underwear" etc. SPIKE!. Hah. Oh internet, you are predictable.
The last time I put myself on a Spending Hiatus it was January 6 2010. I felt full, a slave to consumerism, the meniscus of poorly thought out purchases threatening to spill over.
This time I'm just tired.
Tomorrow is a new month. We are closing in on halfway through 2011. I've always believed that resolutions are not to be restricted to a new year. I have made resolutions on a new week, a new day, and this time, a new month. As such I have made an April Resolution.
Save for birthday presents, a jacket I have on layby, and perhaps a car*, I will not be buying anything until July.
You are a surprise. I know you're always there on the heels of January but this year your arrival has felt swift. So swift. It could be because most of January passed in a sea of sand and sun and kisses. But probably more likely because I just wasn't paying much attention. Because of the sand and sun and, most of all, because of the kisses.
I'm looking forward to you this year, February. I am deep in rehearsals for Much Ado About Nothing, and both Craig and I are approaching life with a get-out-and-do-things attitude. With the cycling and the running and the little trips around the place. And! you hold in your midst Valentines Day. On a MONDAY of all days. But I forgive you for that. Next year it falls on a Tuesday (my least favourite of the days) and we may have to have words about that. But for 2011 I forgive you. I like Valentines Day. I must remember to remind Craig of this fact. He often forgets.
The only complaint is that I have one day free between now and 6 March. I know you are responsible for nothing after the 28th but! It's only day 1 of February and I have the next 28 days spread out ahead of me and they are ALL full. With work and oh so many rehearsals* and drink dates with friends and at least one play. So it's not like they're filled with hardship but ... I am tired thinking about it all.
This year people seem to be fasting for you, February. I don't see why. Perhaps for the alliteration. But I neither want nor really need to fast. I am not gluttonous. However I do plan to begin my post-Hawaii stop-spending regime. Perhaps my February Fast could be from my Credit Card? It is getting a little ridiculous, no not the bill just my ability to rattle off all 16 numbers from memory (23 if you count the expiry date and security code) so perhaps I will get a new card and hide it away. I managed it well in the months leading up to Hawaii and my purchase of Vlad the iPad. But I have fallen a little since then. Oops.
But hey, this is just a little letter. It is not a binding contract. I am simply telling you that, in your honour, I am going to try harder. I will probably fail but then, crucially, I will try again and hopefully fail better.
Can you believe it's February already? I can't. Truly, I can't. It just baffles me. I think the reason that I'm having such trouble coming to terms with month 2/12 is that it hasn't really felt like January down this end of the world. We in the Southern Hemisphere are supposed to have some semblance of a summer - admittedly a more temperate version than most other places in the WORLD - and yet Wellington has not had 2 weekend days of sun in a row since November and that feels like an eternity ago. And it is now officially completely unacceptable. If it goes on much longer ... well, I'll just pout. But I will WISH I could do something about it.
In other not-so-interesting news, dearest, darling, The Internet, I have become obsessed with an iPhone Application called Sleep Cycle. For $1.29 and a little bit of panic regarding crushing the phone in my sleep (NOT YET!) it tracks my sleeping patterns and ... well, it tracks when I am sleeping deeply, dreaming, or sleeping very lightly. And then it wakes me when I'm pretty much awake already. Oh and it's not arbitrary. You set what time you need to be awake - in my case, on exercise days, that is 4:30am (YES, I KNOW that's early.) - and it chooses the best time in the preceding half hour to set the alarm off. Like yesterday! it woke me at 4:09am BUT! I did not feel drowsy at all. It's like magic! Boring boring magic.
Ahh, I do not care that it was 21 minutes earlier than necessary. Anything that makes waking up at 4:30(ish)am easier is oh, just fine by me.
Yours in geekery, Sarah-Rose
p.s. February is my favourite month of the year. The weather is (or HAD BETTER BE) better than in January, I like St Valentine's Day* which is precisely one month after our wedding anniversary, and I simply enjoy the number 2.
* The roots of St. Valentine's Day can be traced back to the Roman fertility festival of Lupercalia. On Lupercalia, a young man would draw the name of a young woman in a lottery and would then keep the woman as a sexual companion for the year!
I don't know how and I don't know why* but I'm involved in yet another to-do, hullabaloo, revue, production with the Butterfly Creek Theatre Troupe. And our rehearsals are on Tuesdays and Thursdays and Sundays (oh my).
Forgive me, dear Internet, for it seems that in order to keep my head above the metaphorical waters, to distract myself from the reality that I don't live in London, that I haven't for a year, & shan't for oh lord, maybe another year, in order to survive in suburbia, I have heaped the plate of my life right to the edges. I have rehearsal 2-3 days a week, exercise as often as humanly possible, a yen to trip away up the coast, a week of house sitting, a 7:30-5 job (Dolly Who?), friends, a husband, photography projects, tv-obsessions, a trip to Japan to plan, a storage unit to unpack, a house to furnish on a severe budget**, a pile of books-to-read as tall as my knees, tattoos to plan*** and and and and and and and!
Please ignore that keening sound. It will pass soon.
My cup (plate! damn mixed metaphors) overfloweth. But! I hope (I HOPE) that productivity breeds productivity and that this darling site doesn't fall by the wayside.
xoxo
Sarah-Rose
* that's a lie. I do it because I love it. It's like crack to me. ** Craig-o-potamus and I are moving. In November. Details to follow when they become interesting. *** Kidding Mum!
Dear The Internet, I have spent all of today learning about CPR, AVPU, DRSABCDE, and another acronym I cannot remember*, and spent this evening regaling my family with helpful facts about the colour & viscosity of intra-cranial fluid, how to deal with a partial amputation, & how much blood is lost as a result of total amputation**. They love me! As a result?I forgot about this darling little site until just now. Please accept this photo of stingrays & their adorable stingray faces with my sincere apologies. xoxo Sarah-Rose
* Cardio Pulmonary Resuscitation. Alert, responds to Voice, responds to Pain, Unresponsive. Danger, Response, Send for help, Airway, Breathing, Circulation, Disruption, Exposure/Environment. ** Straw coloured & like cooking oil. Move back into position, apply pressure & a moist dressing. Only about 2 tablespoons!
p.s. for the record, Craig and I are NOT brother and sister! p.p.s. okay, yes, I have written in the past that our love feels more like incest (ew), but I also wrote it was like conjoined twins, like some metaphysical certainty, more than just a boy and a girl who fell together. so please, please, please look up the definition of simile because Internet? you're giving me a reputation!
I love twitter. The following exchange took place at 6am New Zealand time
I always worry that people who don't know me will point and laugh. Hence the hesitation. I shouldn't have been so damned ridiculous. Noone pointed and laughed. In fact? I received several compliments!
This is the best shot of the new necklace (kenneth jay lane via outnet.com) that sparked the idea for the Heidi hair.
Plus, I'd just seen an instructional video which gave me the secret to the Heidi braid*.
(note: the rarely seen 0g ear hole)
My hairstyle pretty much made my day today. Thank you Wendy Brandes!
* The secret? You start the plaits at right angles to your head, like pippi longstockings but then plait them upwards, against your head. I always thought you just made plaited pigtails then folded them upwards and then scowled at the mess they made.
Hi! How've you been? It's been forever and a week. Or something. Ages. Really Ages. And ever ever so much has happened!
Like right now? I'm in New Zealand. Unless you follow my twitterings religiously (ha!) you might not have noticed as it was all a tremendous secret. I left London on a Tuesday, arrived in Wellington on a Thursday (Hi? Wednesday? Where were you? GONE! NOWHERE! DEATH! I only saw you for an hour in Hong Kong)) and proceeded to actually Hide Out as my secret squirrel sister couldn't quite convince my Dad that there was an actual honest to G reason that we should celebrate Mum's birthday a day early. And despite the ludicrous incident where my family walked within inches of the parked car I was sitting in (I had to duck!) the surprise worked amazingly. I have never seen my mother's face look so terrifyingly mask like. She was speechless and best of all she didn't bleed on me (there is precedent).
Despite all the gaiety I have mainly been disappeared because my photo didn't even place in the Shortlist competition (you might have guessed that). Thankfully I actually liked 3 out of the 4 winning entries. By the end of it all I was completely sick of that photo and I couldn't go near Oh freaking Darling dot net dot nz. Ack.
And because, oh most of all because our grip on our London Idyll is ever so tenuous and I can't talk too much about it without screeching and blood pouring from my ears. There's nothing that can be done. The Home Office mist have its' way with us and we ... (really regretting this metaphor) have to bend over and take it.
Craig and I have been attempting to make Life Decisions (Hi! we're hugely indecisive. HATE) but thankfully we have plans and contingencies and while they don't include being in Rome for my 25th Birthday, I'm pretty happy with them. I've decided that I simply won't turn 25 until I can be in Rome.
This is all compounded (Yes. MORE DRAMA. How am I holding it together? Ha. You make me laugh.) by the fact that CRAIG IS STILL IN LONDON! We have been apart for 17 days and there are 22 (ack) more before we are reunited. And on top of THAT, next Monday, the 14th July 2008 marks EIGHT YEARS of Craig & I being Craig & I.
Keep calm & carry on. Keep calm & carry on. Keep calm & carry on. Keep calm & carry on. Keep calm & carry on. Keep calm & carry on. Keep calm & carry on. Keep calm & carry on.
Please excuse Sarah and Craig for their absences of late, and those that are without doubt, to occur in the very near future.
See, they are very very busy people, what with the working all the time and saving money and driving and walking, and eating and tv watching and general staying-alive-ness. On top of all that they decided it would be an Exciting! and Fun! idea to sign up to become Bartenders. Sorry, that's Bar/Wait -people (even though it was only ever advertised as a BAR course, but that's something completely different that makes Sarah's Head Explode™) and this bar course takes place from 6pm until 10pm (approximately) the first three nights of the week, two weeks in a row. This means that the Exciting! and Fun! idea causes Sarah and Craig to be out of the house from 7 in the morning until about 10:30 in the evening.
Now, generally going to bed at 11pm is not uncommon in the Burkes House, but more often than not it is preceeded by at least a couple of hours of lying in front of the heater and tv and not with travel and making drinks and concentrating and cleaning. Cleaning is actually far more tiring than watching tv it seems.
On top of all that! they are still sans l'ordinateur (that is to say, without a computer) at their place of residence. Which makes it hard for Sarah to string even two thoughts together to make even the semblance of an entry (generally it only takes two thoughts anyway, one of which is "I really should write an entry"). This Exciting! and Fun! idea has now made Sarah so tired that this morning she felt entirely nauseated. Which is surprisingly uncommon for 6am Sarah.
After the second week of the course Craig and Sarah are then going into hiding for a weekend. Ssh. They will let you know much much more upon their return. Hopefully by then Sarah will have a computer that she can use to post her photographs. She has a 256MB Memory Card full of photos just waiting to be seen.
So, Again, Sorry for the absences, but you have to admit ... it's a pretty good excuse.
